Just scared. Turning to this thing just because you're frightened of what may happen to you if you don't. I have always wondered if that mattered to anyone in particular. You have my envy. More than anyone else. I'm jealous of your absolute...what? I don't know what it is I'm jealous of. Perhaps it's the fact you don't have to find security in earthly things like me. But I wouldn't understand now, would I? I'm just this. So foul, so tainted with..yes, that word again. I'm sorry you think that about me, I'm sorry I simply can't believe what you do. No I won't take a brochure, it's wasted on me. You don't understand how much I wish I could. I should stop apologising, sorry. You don't want to talk about it? No, that's fine. Sometimes things are better left unsaid.
MM
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