I am a many sided thing

I am difficult, and I am bizarre. Sometimes I am hard to spot in the background. I am a trier and a wisher and a thinker. I am a counsellor and a listener and a sharer of mundane stories.

I am a hoarder of memories and a believer in people. I am a hoper and a dreamer; I am a follower of self yet confused about what and who I am.

I am a sinner and a saint. I am modern and I am old fashioned. I am mature and I am childish. I am an untidy perfectionist. I can be a rebel - but mostly I'm a follower. I can know my own mind, but often I'm indecisive.

I am always there and yet still a stranger. I know what I like, but not what I want. I love myself and hate myself. I am free and I am caged. I am a living oxymoron, a sentient contradiction. I am one small part of a whole. I am an individual.

I am confused by myself - by what I believe, what I should believe, and the distinction between the two. I am easily bored and easily excited. I am a learner and a discoverer and an explorer. I am a builder and a creator. 

But most of all I am me, and I cannot be described; least of all by myself.

RB